"Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to such a pass that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love, and in order to occupy and distract himself without love he gives way to passions and coarse pleasures, and sinks to bestiality in his vices, all from continual lying to other men and to himself. The man who lies to himself can be more easily offended than any one. You know it is sometimes very pleasant to take offense, isn't it? A man may know that nobody has insulted him, but that he has invented the insult for himself, has lied and exaggerated to make it picturesque, has caught at a word and made a mountain out of a molehill-he knows that himself, yet he will be the first to take offense, and will revel in his resentment till he feels great pleasure in it, and so pass to genuine vindictiveness." - Fyodor Dostoevsky's - The Brothers Karamazov _The greatest goal of your twenties is not to seem successful—it’s to become formidable. Don’t just chase the warmth of the crowd, the paycheck, or the prestige of a brand-name firm. What matters most is whether you build real skill and courage, whether you become someone who can make a lasting difference in the world. That happens not through shortcuts, but by sticking with work that matters to you long after the excitement fades, and by getting back up when you’re knocked down. Most of all, it means having the courage to bet on yourself._ _Don’t waste your twenties trying to look good; use them to actually become good._ _When you discover something that gives you energy, surround yourself with the smartest and kindest people you can find—and ask them to teach you. Two years with the right mentors will be worth twenty years in the wrong room. But remember, this only happens if you’re humble enough to admit you don’t already have all the answers._ _Pay attention to who you let in._ **_You will become the people you spend your time with_**_—and that goes not just for mentors, but peers and partners as well. Take a moment to think about everyone around you. Do they share your values, hopes, and dreams? Are they going where you want to go? If not, you can lovingly step back. Don’t waste time chasing people, romantically or otherwise. The right people will see you and will appreciate you for who you really are. You will feel it and know it. Clearing space for these people may feel lonely at first, and you might have the urge to hang on, even when you know someone isn’t right for you. But letting go is what makes room for the people who truly light you up._ **_The future is not some magical destination; it’s simply more present moments, just like the ones you’re in now, inviting you to live in them._** _Don’t wish these moments away—they_ _are_ _your life._ The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing you life will start “when.” When you pay off your student loans, when you find the right job, when you’re married, when the kids are older, when, when, when, when, when. I spent a lot of time thinking about the things I needed to get through before life got started, before realizing those things I was trying to “get through” **_were_ my life**. In 22 years of teaching at Stanford, **_I’ve never heard a student say, “There’s something I’m excited about, but I’m never going to do it.” Instead, they say the two most dangerous words: “Not now.”_** But here’s the thing about winnable games: you don’t always know where you’ll find them. I never thought I’d find my purpose running a private equity firm. So, you might as well start looking where you are. Because I can assure you of one thing: you’re not going to find your game by standing on the sidelines. You’re not going to find it by hedging. You’re not going to find it by being half in and half out. And if you’re not careful, you will spend your whole life in that place — waiting for the perfect moment, which, of course, never arrives. [Graham Weaver](https://www.grahamweaver.com/blog/a-letter-to-my-20-year-old-self)